The Birth of the Ego

My adorable niece, Annalise, was born this afternoon to my beautiful sister and her loving husband, and as I held her in my arms before the nurse took her away, I realized how excited I was to get to know this little person.  I genuinely can't wait to find out who she is, what she's like, and who she's going to be.  But as I thought about this throughout the day, I found myself conflicted about my beliefs on the matter of personality.  Are we born unique individuals?  Are personalities innate, or are they created through our environment, our upbringing, our schooling, our thoughts, and ultimately our choices?  Is who we are something that transcends birth/death?  And on that note, is our personality an accurate reflection of who we are, or is it it all the fabrication of the ego?  Does nurture or nature define who we'll become, or do we have a spiritual path that is predestined before we're even born?

I'm not sure I can truthfully answer any of these questions, because I'm seldom satisfied with their implications.  It's like I'm of two minds on the subject; yes personalities are pre-existing, but we also create them as we go.  The personality isn't a manifestation of spirit, but rather the ego...and yet since it's pre-existing, it means your personality is a part of you in the before/afterlife (meaning that the ego would then carry on with you into these loftier realms...an admission I'm not terribly CERTAIN of).  Your destiny is mapped out for you before you incarnate, but you always have a choice...and you can choose to reject it or not experience it at all if you so choose.  And on and on. 

These apparent contradictions trouble me, and tend to make me feel like I have no particular set of beliefs at all.  When someone asks me, "Well, do you believe in..." I automatically say YES, no matter what they bring up, because I guess that, when you get right down to it, I believe in everything.  This may make me seem dull, and overly agreeable, but it's the truth of how I feel.  Now, that's not to say that I don't PREFER certain beliefs, and pride myself on subscribing to particular ways of thinking (I am a Gnostic Christian, afterall)...but I just think that ALL beliefs are valid, that 'nothing is real, therefore everything is permitted.'

So, with that being said, I do think that Annalise already has a personality; that she's a wholly distinct and wonderful presence that I simply cannot wait to discover in the years to come.